Ready to Build a Life Full of Joy and Meaning? Discover This Step-by-Step Method to Design the Life You Want!
Introduction
Are you feeling stuck or unsure about where your life is headed? Life doesn’t have to be something that happens to you—what if you could design it, just like you would a project or a piece of art? With a methodical approach, you can create a life that’s not only well-lived but deeply fulfilling.
In this guide, we’ll walk you through a step-by-step process to take control of your future. Based on insights from “Designing Your Life” by Bill Burnett and Dave Evans, you’ll learn to assess where you are, clarify your direction, and make confident choices that lead to a joyful, purposeful life.
Let’s explore these steps starting from where you are and ending with actionable plans for a meaningful future. It’s time to design a life that works for you!
Step 1: Take Stock of Your Life – Where Are You Now?
Begin your journey by taking an honest look at your life in the areas that matter most: Health, Work, Play, and Love. Reflect on each area and rate your current satisfaction levels on a scale from 0 to full. This helps you identify where you’re thriving and where you may need more balance or change.
Example: You might feel strong in your career but notice you’ve neglected your personal relationships. This simple reflection helps you see where to focus next.
Guiding Questions:
- How satisfied am I with my health (physical, mental, emotional)?
- Do I feel fulfilled in my work or career? Why or why not?
- Am I spending enough time on play, hobbies, and leisure activities?
- How strong are my relationships with loved ones and friends?
- What area of my life needs the most attention right now?
Step 2: Identify Problems You Can Solve – Gravity vs. Wicked Problems
Not all problems are created equal. Some issues are like gravity—you can’t change them, and wasting energy trying to fight them will only frustrate you. Others are wicked problems, meaning they’re complex and require a creative, long-term approach. Learn to recognize which kind of problem you’re dealing with, so you can focus on what’s actually solvable.
Example: Wanting to change the way society values certain careers (like artists) is a gravity problem. Instead, focus on how you can support yourself while pursuing your passion.
Guiding Questions:
- Is this a problem I can realistically solve, or is it beyond my control?
- Am I investing energy in something I cannot change?
- How can I reframe this problem into something actionable?
- What small step can I take to address this problem right now?
- Do I need to accept this situation and refocus my energy elsewhere?
Step 3: Create Your Personal Compass – Align with Your Values
Once you understand where you are, the next step is to define your values by building your personal compass. Your compass is a combination of your Workview (your beliefs about work and what makes it meaningful) and your Lifeview (your broader perspective on what makes life valuable). This helps you make decisions that are aligned with your true self.
Example: If your Lifeview prioritizes family time, but your Workview involves climbing the corporate ladder, you may need to reassess how these values intersect.
Guiding Questions:
- What does work mean to me? Why do I work?
- What makes life meaningful and valuable in my view?
- Do my work values align with my life values, or do they conflict?
- Am I living in a way that feels true to my values?
- What needs to change in my work or life to align with my core values?
Step 4: Clarify Your Direction – Pay Attention to What Energizes You
Now that you have a compass, it’s time to find your path. Rather than searching for a specific destination, start by noticing what activities make you feel engaged and energized. Keep a “Good Time Journal” where you track your activities and note which ones bring you joy and focus. This will help reveal your natural direction.
Example: If you find that you’re most energized during team collaborations, this clue can point you toward roles that involve teamwork and creative problem-solving.
Guiding Questions:
- What activities make me feel engaged and focused?
- When do I feel most energized and alive during my day?
- Are there activities that drain my energy or leave me feeling disconnected?
- How often do I lose track of time while doing something I enjoy?
- What patterns or themes are emerging in my “Good Time Journal”?
Step 5: Explore New Ideas – Brainstorm Multiple Solutions
When you feel stuck or unsure, don’t rush into the first option that comes to mind. Instead, use mind mapping to generate a variety of ideas. Start with three key activities from your “Good Time Journal” and brainstorm related opportunities. You’ll often discover exciting new directions you hadn’t considered.
Example: If you enjoy outdoor activities, mind mapping might lead you to explore careers in outdoor education, environmental work, or even event planning for outdoor activities.
Guiding Questions:
- What are the three activities that bring me the most joy and energy?
- What related activities could I explore from these key interests?
- Are there career options or hobbies I’ve never considered but that align with my interests?
- Which of these new ideas feels most exciting or worth exploring further?
- How can I try out one of these new ideas in a low-risk way?
Step 6: Design Alternative Futures – Create Multiple Life Plans
There isn’t just one perfect life waiting for you to find it. In fact, you have several potential lives you could lead! Design three alternative five-year plans, each exploring a different path. This exercise opens your mind to new possibilities and helps you feel less constrained by a single option.
Example: One life plan might focus on staying in your current career, another on moving to a new city, and a third on pursuing a passion project full-time.
Guiding Questions:
- If I had no constraints, what would I want my life to look like in five years?
- What would happen if I made a bold, unconventional choice in my career or personal life?
- How would I feel about staying on my current path for the next five years?
- What skills or resources do I need to create each alternative future?
- Which of these plans excites me the most? Which feels the most practical?
Step 7: Prototype Your Future – Test Your Ideas in the Real World
Before fully committing to a new path, test it out by prototyping. This means gathering real-world data by having conversations with people who’ve taken similar steps or by trying short, low-commitment experiences related to your ideas. This way, you can learn and adjust before diving in.
Example: If you're interested in opening a café, work part-time at one or talk to café owners to get a sense of the challenges and joys they face.
Guiding Questions:
- Who can I talk to who has experience in the path I want to explore?
- What small experiment can I try to get a taste of this new idea?
- How did I feel after testing this idea—more excited or less certain?
- What did I learn from this prototype experience that I didn’t expect?
- How can I adjust my approach based on what I’ve learned so far?
Step 8: Learn from Feedback and Failures – Transform Mistakes into Growth
Failure is not the end—it's a source of learning and growth. After testing your prototypes, take time to reflect on the feedback and any mistakes or unexpected outcomes. Follow a simple three-step process: 1) Log your failures, 2) Categorize them (e.g., small missteps or major setbacks), and 3) Identify growth insights. This helps you turn failure into a powerful tool for success.
Example: If a prototype didn’t go as planned, like a business venture failing to gain traction, use the experience to refine your approach. Perhaps you gained valuable insights on customer needs or pricing strategies.
Guiding Questions:
- What were the key failures or mistakes I encountered during my prototypes?
- How can I categorize these failures—were they minor missteps or significant obstacles?
- What lessons can I extract from each failure?
- How can I apply these insights to improve my next steps?
- Am I viewing failure as a natural part of growth and learning?
Step 9: Make a Decision – Take the Next Actionable Step
After gathering information from your prototypes and learning from your failures, it’s time to make a decision. Don’t aim for perfection, but choose a path that feels right based on the data you’ve gathered. The key is to take action, knowing you can always adjust along the way.
Example: After prototyping a side business, you might decide to transition into it full-time or adjust it into a smaller passion project.
Guiding Questions:
- What have I learned from testing different options?
- Which path feels the most aligned with my values and energy?
- What’s the first, actionable step I can take in this direction?
- Am I willing to take imperfect action and adjust as I go?
- What would success look like in this new direction, and how will I measure it?
3 Bonus Steps to Design the Life You Want
Bonus Step 1: Apply the 80/20 Rule – Prioritize Your Efforts
Identify the 20% of activities that bring 80% of your joy, success, or results, and focus your time and energy on them. This will help you maximize satisfaction and minimize time wasted on unfulfilling pursuits.
Example: If you find that working on creative projects brings you the most fulfillment, prioritize these over administrative tasks that drain your energy.
Guiding Questions:
- What are the top activities that give me the most joy or satisfaction?
- How can I allocate more time to these high-impact activities?
- Are there tasks I can delegate or eliminate to focus on what truly matters?
- Which areas of my life would benefit the most from applying the 80/20 rule?
- How can I make time for these top activities each week?
Bonus Step 2: Set SMART Goals for Each Life Area – Define Clear Objectives
Once you've assessed your life balance, define specific, measurable, attainable, relevant, and time-bound (SMART) goals for each area (Health, Work, Play, Love). Clear goals provide direction and focus.
Example: Instead of saying, “I want to get fit,” a SMART goal would be, “I will go to the gym three times a week for the next three months.”
Guiding Questions:
- What specific goals do I want to achieve in each life area?
- How will I measure my progress toward these goals?
- Are my goals realistic and attainable given my current situation?
- How do these goals align with my core values and desires?
- What is the timeline for achieving each goal, and how will I hold myself accountable?
Bonus Step 3: Commit to Self-Accountability or Find an Accountability Partner
Think about what you can do to make yourself accountable. Share your plans and ideas with a friend, mentor, or coach who can help keep you on track. Regular check-ins with someone you trust will provide encouragement and constructive feedback.
Example: If your goal is to write a book, schedule weekly check-ins with a writing buddy to discuss progress and share drafts.
Guiding Questions:
- Who in my life can support my goals and hold me accountable?
- What systems can I put in place to track my progress?
- How often should I check in with my accountability partner?
- What challenges might arise, and how can I overcome them with support?
- How will I celebrate milestones and progress along the way?
Conclusions
- Strengths: This method empowers you to take control of your life through reflection and actionable steps.
- Weaknesses: Some may find it difficult to implement without external support or coaching.
- Encourages flexibility and openness to new possibilities, reducing fear of failure.
- Helps you align your daily choices with your core values, leading to greater satisfaction.
Alternative Methods
Vision Boarding: Create a visual representation of your goals and dreams to clarify your future aspirations.
80/20 Principle: Focus on the 20% of your efforts that produce 80% of your results for more efficient progress.
Positive Psychology Techniques: Use methods like gratitude journaling and strengths identification to boost happiness and life satisfaction.
GROW Model: A structured coaching framework that helps you set goals, explore reality, identify options, and create a way forward.
